Never lose track of yourself

One day you wake up, and look at the mirror and see a person you don’t know, a person that looks a lot like you, has your features, but strangely you don’t recognize that person. Because deep inside of yourself, you realize that this is not YOU… and if it was indeed you, you fail to acknowledge how did you end up here. When did you lose track?

I was having a coaching session with a fantastic individual recently, and she was describing how her life lead her to a crossroads, where either direction would lead to a path that she doesn’t fantasy; she stopped at that particular point and is thinking hard on that potential destination, and that difficult decision that would lead her nowhere. The most interesting part about that conversation is that she has been at that point in her life, by the time of our session for more than four years.   

You would be surprised to know that Ms. X was not the only individual facing such a situation and that our session brought several flashbacks from others who were at her exact place without notice, whether in a work/professional or personal context; You may call it “Stuck” or a “Dead end” or whatever synonym  that would resonate more to you, what I would like to share with you in this article, is my point of view on this.

What I told Ms. X, after a long and warm talk that transported her to a time where she felt the complete opposite and where destinations were clearer, and decisions were more natural:   

“You Have lost track but not of where you are going, but instead, you have lost track of yourself. You lost yourself somewhere, at some point in time. Now you are allowing someone else to take over your decisions, a different person that looks like you, sounds like you, but deep inside, that isn’t YOU.”

I wish I can tell you that there is an easy solution for anyone in this situation; there isn’t. But there is a clear answer to that question, and the answer is always YOU.

At some point in our life, the sum of all of our experiences shapes who we are and who we have become; in one of my research, I emphasized on the different points that shape our individualities which I call them S.P.I.C.E.D that stands for S: Story, P: Personality, I: Interests, C: Culture, E: Education and D for Diversity; so when you look at all of these elements combined, you would feel there is someone underneath all of that… and simply, that Someone is YOU!

If you have limited battery life on your phone and you are let’s say traveling with no access to a near charger for at least 3 hours, your decisions on how you would use your phone will become more strategic; Pretty much when you realize the value of your time, your actions and decisions will start making more sense, and you won’t be able to understand and appreciate the value of your time if you can’t value your Self.

Our Tip for this week is never losing track of who you are because when you do, an alternative ego or a ghost-version of you will take over and will start taking control of everything.

And just like the Phone Battery, realize that you have a finite time and energy, so make sure you appreciate that as a gift.

Have a wonderful week,

SC

Samer Chidiac is a Strategic Innovation Advisor, a Business Psychologist, a Philanthropist, an Author and a Speaker. 

You can check his Books on Amazon & Sellfy, Follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and check his Website for More.

Get to know your own angels and demons

When I was young, and was watching cartoon, there has always been that situation, when the character is about to do something (good or bad), and suddenly they an angel and a devil would appear on each of her shoulder and where each would advise on their own preference…

In many points in our life we may face some situations (let’s call them opportunities for now) where we need to take a decision to seize the moment and go for it or stop our selves from taking another step. Whether you prefer to visualize the small angel and demon talking to you or not… Each of us have some sort of an internal mechanism… You can call it whatever you want (Habits, Instincts, Values, Beliefs, Cultures… etc) but at the end, it’s what drives you to take the next step or not.

“Our minds sometimes see what our hearts wish were true.” 

Dan Brown, Angels & Demons

This week’s tip is about getting to know the Angel & Demon of yours, and how to make sure you don’t have to deal with them at the wrong time. (At least not without knowing them)

The reason this is important is because you would want to get to know yourself better and to have more control over your actions rather than making other uncontrollable factors making you take a decision when you are more vulnerable than your normal 100%.

According to research, if you get under stress and let’s say you are in a fear from something, your brain will shut down some of the functionality and will give over the control to “habit”, so you would do whatever you are used to always do; I guess it’s something that has to do with the evolution of the old man being chased by lions and stuff… So if you were pushed under pressure and your logic got stuck and the auto-pilot took over and you don’t have any time to try out something new, but had to apply “what you always did”… What would that be? and will the Angel take control or will it be the Demon?

You may be in a crisis situation, a relationship “situation”, or just by random. How do would you trigger your Angel Auto-pilot or your Demon Auto-pilot to come out for a small chat?

Well it’s not as simple as it may sound, however, and luckily for you, the source of the wiring our brains are pretty much the same Fundamentally. So Whether the source of stress is actually a lion chasing you, or late bills chasing you; Or the source of Opportunity is a Burger King’s Whooper or a long term Investment… The chemicals in your head would almost act the same. And with high chances that the Angel / Demon would use the same logic on your behalf and you would act the same…

So for this week, try to get to know more about YOU by rehearsing some fake situations or fictional scenarios such as imagining that you were seduced by someone else’s partner while you are married… How would you react? or watch a movie and see if you were in a situation of the bad guy… How would you act?

It’s a funny exercise that you will get better at it with time… and the more you rehearse it… and once you get to know your angel and demon more… You can then TRAIN THEM to act in a specific way rather than relying on what would happen by chance.

Have a great week,
SC

Samer Chidiac is a Strategic Innovation Advisor, a Business Psychologist, a Philanthropist, an Author and a Speaker. 

You can check his Books on Amazon & Sellfy, Follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and check his Website for More.

The Mirror has one face… Yours!

It’s this period of the year again… We are closing on 2018, a year that was filled with so many events and activities that will keep us talking for many years to come. What was your reflection on your year?

If you are someone like me, the year 2018 itself was not just a year, but somehow a milestone year that concluded an era of many years before that; whether personally or professionally. 

Like the legend of the phoenix
All ends with beginnings
What keeps the planet spinning
The force of love beginning 

~ Daft Punk – Get Lucky
Songwriters: Guy-Manuel De Homem-Christo / Nile Rodgers / Pharrell Williams / Thomas Bangalter 

 The world have changed, but so did you, so it’s just unfair to look solely on what the external factors are and omit the fact that your life have evolved with almost the same rate, and you because (most likely) a totally different person than who you were 5 or 10 years back. 

Looking at the Mirror

When we look at the mirror, we see ourselves, (duhhh), but how much we observe versus how much we see, how much we omit versus how much we audit, the answer could be fascinating for you to answer. 

There’s a famous experiment that involved putting a frog in the boiler with a regular temperature water, and then slightly increasing the temp by 1 degree every period of time, and despite that the water is getting hotter and hotter, the frog fails to identify what was actually happen, until eventually he boils to death. 

And so many of us are that frog, and so many of us are looking at the mirror everyday to see the bowl of water heating up by 1 degree, and not taking any action, because nothing dramatic is happening OR because we think that “when the time gets critical… I will do something dramatic to change”, whether you want to start eating healthy or finding a better job or do something about a relationship issue; 

The tip for this week, and this year, is to look at the mirror and observe critically the person you find on the other side, ASK YOURSELF if you recognize him or her, is there any change you want to do, are you at the point ‘Just One More Degree before Boiling’? 

Close on this year by counting your blessings, and learning from your mistakes, and most certainly Looking forward to a Better you… A News more enhanced version of YOU… That will start on the same day you looked at the mirror.

To End this year, from myself to you, from my family to yours I’m wishing you and all your loved ones a happy new year 2019 filled with love, success and prosperity. 

Warm regards,
SC

Samer Chidiac is a Strategic Innovation Advisor, a Business Psychologist, a Philanthropist, an Author and a Speaker. 

You can check his Books on Amazon & Sellfy, Follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and check his Website for More.